From 0 Readers to 6,000 and Still Finding My Way

the hardest parts about sharing my memoir online

When I started this Substack I had 0 subscribers and no idea what I was going to do. Around the same time, I completed the first draft of my memoir, Lonely Girl, and was struggling to decide how I wanted to publish it.

Would I self publish?
Query more agents?
Work with a hybrid publisher?

I had a few leads… but none of these options felt quite right.

I was stumped.

Then, one day, I came across a note written by

David McIlroy

discussing how authors were serializing their books on Substack. As soon as I read the thread, I thought, “This is it. This is what I’m going to!”

I made the decision right then to publish Lonely Girl on Substack.

That was a few months ago.

Now, today, there are over 6,000 of you, and we’re just weeks away from the story being shared in its entirety.

When I started serializing Lonely Girl back in July, I had no idea how hard it would be. I thought I would simply transfer the manuscript into my Substack posts, and that would be it. Plot twist: that was NOT it.

I didn’t predict how much time this would actually take—dozens of hours each week. I ended up blocking off most weekends, weekday nights, and entire days on Wednesdays and Thursdays to edit, format, and record the audio for each chapter.

I also didn’t realize how vulnerable it would feel to share this story with you. There were so many times while editing a chapter that I thought, "Dang, I sound really awful here," or "Why was I so hard on myself back then?” Still, I tried not to edit those parts out—because they were real and reflective of how I thought at the time, even if I don’t feel that way now.

Confronting the less desirable parts of myself, making peace with them, learning how to accept them, all while knowing others might be less forgiving of me—that was hard. And still is.

Writing also became a job. What was once a creative outlet that brought me joy and pleasure eventually felt like a chore. I didn’t want to sit down and write or edit because I was just so tired of being in the weeds all the time.

I also think something that happens during the editing process is that you get so hyper-critical. You start combing through every sentence, noticing mistakes everywhere, like it's your job—because it is—it literally is. So, anytime I’d sit down to write content for social media (content that had nothing to do with Lonely Girl), my inner editor was constantly analyzing and correcting everything. I found this to be super stifling to my creativity. Highly don’t recommend. lol.

Anyway, would I do it again?

Would I publish a book on Substack?

Absolutely. 500%. Sharing this story with you, in this format, challenged me in ways I don’t even think I’ve grasped yet. I am so glad I did this. And I want to continue to write more books and publish them on Substack in the future.

So, where does that leave us? What’s next?

There are 3 chapters of Lonely Girl left to share with you <3 If you haven’t read the previous chapters yet, this is a great time to get caught up before the grand finale!

After the story has been fully released on Substack, we’ll put it in print! I’m so excited to finally hold this book in my hands. It’s been a long time coming.

As for what comes after Lonely Girl, stay tuned. There will be more stories, more videos, and more experiences to explore.

I am hopeful that the best—for you, and for me—is yet to come. Thank you for your support and readership.

With love,
Anna